Miami

USA

November 2006
2 days

Miami Florida
22nd to 24th November 2006

Not quite sure what I ate that last day in Mexico but it returned to haunt me when we had about an hour to board the plane to Miami. There´s no other feeling like being stuck on the loo in the airport departure lounge and hearing calls for your plane to board accross the tannoy! Its great!

I waited for a safe moment, left the gents, headed straight for the chemist, knocked back an Imodium and boarded the plane with my fingers and legs crossed.... &Quot;crew ... doors, check and cross check and prepare for take off...!&Quot; Here we go.....

Luckily Miami sits just North of Cancun so a few hours later we landed in our economy class seats, just a few seconds after first class.... Always baffles me why they pay so much to get there not so very much quicker! The Imodium had served me proudly but the second we got past those miserable customs staff and that cheesy portrait of George Bush I was back in the loo! Welcome to Miami!

Miami Vice
Like Crockett and Tubs we cruised the dangerous streets of Miami South Beach in our white Ferrari cunningly disguised as an Airport Shuttle Bus dodging Hispanic drug lords and Puerto Rican Pimps! We turned the final bend on two wheels and slammed it down outside our digs - The Clay Hotel. Luckily we´d learnt a few Spanish words in Mexico because there are areas here where Spanish is taught as the first language rather than the second.

Where´s Mickey Mouse?
We hadn´t done our research properly and it turned out Disney was nowhere near Miami. Its further north in Orlando Florida - about 8 hours on the Greyhound, Doh. So we promptly cancelled the 3rd, 4th and 5th night in the Clay and headed to the web cafe to book a hotel in Orlando and check the bus schedules.... 20 mins later.... sorted! I love the Internet!

Everyone and His Dog!
The Clay Hotel gave us a map and told us to head to Lincoln Road for dinner. Miami at night has such a cool vibe with a sense of danger about it. Lincoln Road is the main stretch running at 90 degrees away from the beach, and its packed to the rafters with high quality alfresco dining, art studios, cool trendy clothes boutiques and dudes walking their dogs.... dogs everywhere! But at least it's not like in LA, Miami dogs are where they are intended - on all fours and not in some stupid girls handbag.

Cubism
Lincoln Road was a great place to spend an evening walking in and out of the various free art exhibits. We happoned upon a studio displaying the works of a very talented Brazilian guy named Romero Britto. Check out his work at http://www.britto.com he specialises in a pop art style called &Quot;Neo Classical Cubism&Quot; and is superb. His works are collected by the likes of Arnold Schwarzenegger, Michael Jordan and Gloria Estefan to name but a few. We could only afford a couple of postcards and stickers but maybe one day!!!

Thanks Giving
Never having experienced this Stateside holiday before, I was glad to find that it posed the opportunity for me to tuck in to a Traditional Christmas Dinner in November... nice! We chose a medium priced eatery and I had the works washed down with velvety red vino.

After dinner we headed straight for the nearest multiplex cinema to feast our eyes on the latest and long awaited Bond epic: Casino Royale. Being based on poker, I obviously liked it, but thinking back it wasn´t really that special. He played the role well, but it lacked Q and big gadgets and of course it lacked gorgeous bond girls, with really big errrmmm well... gadgets. But had to be seen!

Fancy a Swim!
The next day we booked ourselves on to the Everglades and City Tour thanks to a receommendation from Jonny and Sophie. First was a bus to the everglades where we boarded one of those hovercrafts you´ve seen on TV. It's shown at the beginning of CSIMiami and is basically an old tin bath tub with an oversized hair dryer strapped to the back for propulsion. Holding about 15 tourists and a maniac of a driver who looked like a Hells Angel it sped off in to the lilly filled water.

Immediately we were privvy to viewing the little ankle biters moving around under the surface with only two beady eyes on show, like two deadly periscopes. These Everglades aren´t that deep but go on for miles and miles, laced with danger. We all knew our driver must be trustworthy but his look, demeanor and way he swang the boat around, causing us to get sprayed, made us wonder if he´d ever tipped the vessel over and if so... what would happen!

We could not only see crocs and gators but great plants, butterflies and some huge iguanas, high up in the trees looking like big fat branches.

The driver was full of wit and jokes about keeping your hands inside the boat, so when he pulled up, and started calling out the name of a crocodile I thought he´d just lost the plot.... but after one minute he pointed and about 10 metres away we could see the grass moving and parting on land making way for a huge croc. He comes when called as the driver feeds him bread. We got a good look at this beast before heading back to dry land!

Afterwards you are all shuffled in to an area for a crocodile wrestling display where another guy traps the animals jaws under his chin.... these animals have savage strength when closing their mouths but are weak as kittens when it comes to opening them... good to know. We held a baby croc with its mouth taped shut... brave huh!

City Tour
Later we changed buses and took part in the city tour. We are shown great architecture and wealth. Now you must remember that cheesy little song back in the eighties... &Quot;1, 2,3,4 come on baby say you love, 5,6,7, times....&Quot; yes, Gloria Estefan and The Miami sound machine.... had a few toe tapping pop hits and it now seems she owns Miami! Shes got houses, condos, bars and restaurants all over.... Nice work Gloria!

We then boarded an old red sailing boat for the last leg of the tour. Skulking around nosing at the rich and famous who live on the several man made islands that line this stretch of water. We could see from afar the house where Scarface was filmed and other gorgeous mansions owned by Will Smith and P Diddy and the like, each with their own yacht or speed boat moored up against their front lawns... like ya do!

Rained Off
The next and last day in Miami we intended to check out the beach scene but that was ruined by both poor weather and Sarah being under the weather.

We lied in, and ate a great brunch before resigning ourselves to a day in the web cafe updating the BLOG with know you are all addicted to ....not!

We had an early start the next day as the bus was due to collect us for Orlando at 6am.