Cameron Highlands

Malaysia

April 2007

MALAYSIA - CAMERON HIGHLANDS

A flight back to Kuala Lumpur and we met Helena, Sarah’s friend from London. She works for Cambridge University and had just been to China to deliver a presentation so whilst in the vicinity decided to hook up with us for six days.

Just one night in the city and we set off North to the Cameron Highlands. A four hour bus journey and we were soon way up high in the hills where time stands still. Here you can find the lucrative tea plantations that have provided work to the locals for many years and still do.

The hotel recommended a couple of excursions the first of which was a night jungle walk. We signed up for that, as it was only two hours and should be well within our capability. The guide showed up at 7pm and it turned out to be just the four of us. A nice old man, Indian and spends his days and evenings making small change guiding tourists on many of the walking trails. He’d already done six hours trekking that day and was now ready for more. Fit is not the word.

We set off whilst it was still light and soon he dug around in the grass and plucked out some sturdy walking sticks for us that he obviously had stowed there. We soon reached a rather sad looking waterfall. Not very exciting and so much rubbish had been dumped in the river it spoiled the view. An hour later, we’d hiked up some steep hills and arrived at a peak where we could climb a tall steel tower and look out over the neighbouring villages. It was the last few minutes of daylight and somewhere in the distance we could hear the call to prayer, which is so common in this country several times a day. It sounded a little eerie but pleasant, this chanting sounds over the tree tops.

So as we descended the tower we said OK it’s an hour back in the dark right. No, he replied. This route is another three hours yet. What? We were told two, we cried. Two there, two back he chuckled. We all sighed as it was now dark, the insects were waking up and rain clouds loomed. Forward and on we go.

More steep climbs but now it was under torch light and many a crafty tree root was just waiting to send you flying. Another hour in and he could sense our fatigue, so decided to boost moral by cracking out some sweets and chocolate. Which to be honest worked a treat. He then did his best crocodile Dundee impression and started to chop up thin vines with his gleaming knife. It was at that point that I thought to myself. Here I am standing in the middle of the Malaysian jungle, with just two girls for protection and some guy I only met two hours ago wielding a huge Rambo knife. What if he’s a loon? Who would bother to come looking or us if he chopped us up and buried us? Then my attention returned to the chocolate he was dishing out and like an innocent trusting child I saw this as a sign of friendship and liked him again.

He showed us these very hard thin vines that are covered in tiny sharp spikes and are actually used as whips in the prisons here. Murderers or rapists not only get put away for a very very long time but they also get the pleasure of being whipped by these vines every couple of weeks. Harsh! But then again, so is murdering or raping someone. So then with his knife he stripped off the outer skins and made two very nice bracelets for the girls by twisting two strands together, and as I write this blog on the long flight home to the UK, some four weeks later, Sarah is still wearing hers. Who needs Tiffany’s?

The wildlife was non existent so we were basically judge trudging around and then the heavens opened and turned the floor and especially the roots in to an ice rink. He gave us white/clear ponchos so now in the dark we looked like Casper the Ghost floating around. It was becoming very hard work, up and down steep slippery mud banks, and we longed for a hot shower. I spotted a cool green curly stalk, and took what I feel to be a rather arty shot. Check it out.

So as promised, three hours after the tower we left the jungle but still had a twenty minute walk up the roads to the hotel. We reached our destination at around 11pm, like drowned rats and very tired. We thanked him for the torture (I mean pleasant walk) and paid him a tip and for the ponchos. As he walked away I thought, he’ll probably have an hour walk home and be back out doing the same again bright an early tomorrow. What a life! Give me a desk job and mug of steaming coffee anytime.

We slept like babies, except without the need for a nappy or 3am feed. Up at 8am and out on another day tour, this time not on foot. We really only wanted to see the tea plantations, but this tour offered a massive list of stop offs to see an array of farms, plantations, a waterfall and dinner to boot.

No word of a lie, the tea plantation was very nice but the rest of the tour was the most boring and sad excuse for a day out. We were taken to some very boring places such as:-

* A Strawberry Farm, where you could buy anything possible with a strawberry in it or on it….milkshake, ice cream, biscuits, badges, stickers, slippers, posters, pencils, rubbers, t-shirts, you name it)
* Rose valley, a dull flower centre with endless colours of roses. (ZZZZZ)
* Orchid Farm (YAWN)
* Cactus Valley (Now this was dull, but we managed to recover the situation when we found two rather amusing cactus plants and with a little naughty rearranging, I think you’ll agree we got a very very funny cactus shot.. please see)
* Chrysanthemum Farm (DULL)
* Honey Bee Farm (Not too bad. The bees were rubbish but in the corner they had cages with some very strange looking insects, beetles, reptiles, snakes and other creepies.) Again, please see the photos and look out for the Grumpy Frog, Cute Gecko and Rhinoceros Beetle)
* Then the obvious highlight of the day when he pulled up at the watercress farm and said, Ok you have fourty minutes here. What? Don’t you mean four minutes you stupid man, its just a small field of watercress, what exactly do you expect us to look at for fourty minutes. He sensed our angst and let us leave after ten.
* Butterfly farm (Some nice specimens here)

Then we asked why we hadn’t seen the waterfall as the brochure promised one that you could swim under. He looked shifty and said no, but we insisted as Helena had heard of one nearby in the guide book. So he took us there and low and behold if it wasn’t the one we’d seen on our night walk last night. More of a sewagey trickle… What a joke. Oh and you can’t swim in it he remarked. No Sh*t Sherlock. LOL

So by now we were tired of getting in and out of the minivan only to be shown, items most people grow in their own back gardens, so opted to go straight to the free dinner. It was a Steam Boat dinner which means you get a large boiling pan on your table with veggie stock in the water and then you throw in your own veggies or meats and they cook quickly. It was an experience and that’s all I’m saying on the matter. What a day!

I’m a tourist, Get me out of here…….